First love

Today I opened my box of jewellery and my eyes caught sight of a pair of earrings that I have long forgotten. It was a gift from my ex-bf before I came home after finishing my uni. The sight of the earrings brought back memories which has long been forgotten.

We met during my final semester in the uni. I volunteered to be part of a group of 'senior' students that will take care of new students when they arrived at the uni. I can still remember the date when I met him at the lecture hall during the enrolment process. He was with his 3 friends and together the 4 of them had bewildered look on their faces and they did look very lost. I walked over and I struck up conversation with them and helped them with their enrolment. Funny... at that point I can only remember his friends but I can only remember him as being tall, thin and very very dark.

After the enrolment was over, I have totally forgotten about them. But fate has decided otherwise... The next day, I bumped into the 4 of them nearly everywhere I went to. The cafetaria, the library, the lecture hall.. They called me and we all had a good laugh about it.

One day me and my best friend met them on our way back from our grocery shopping. Being new in the country and they dare not venture out to the city, they took the bus for a ride around the suburbs. And me and my best friend boarded the same bus. We were all surprised, again at the frequency we bumped into each other.

We invited them to our house for dinner and they were so happy at the prospect of eating a good home cooked meal. Our friendship have been sealed from that day onwards. Soon after that, they will hang out at our place while waiting for their house to be ready (Our landlord has another house nearby for rent). Somehow or rather, because of the similarity of my age and my ex-bf's age, his friends tend to tease us how both of us would be suitable as bf-gf.

We had a good laugh about it and my ex-bf suggested that we play along and I agreed to it. We called each other 'dear' and acted like a real couple. They teased us more about it after that. I did not any special feelings for him at that point and I treated him as a very good friend.

The semester started and again my ex-bf and I are enrolled in the same course. He dropped by my house quite often for dinner and we spent time together for our assignments and studies. And my best friend and I would drop by their place as well to hang out. It became a norm for us to stay over at each other's place. His friends purposely put me into his room when I stayed over as my landlord placed an extra mattress in his room.

He is from Singapore and prior to coming to the uni, he finished his national service. One habit he picked up from his army days is that he'll talk with his army mates before he sleeps. And he continued to do that with me. From all this late night talks, we got to know each other better. I felt honoured that he told me things that his friends would never know.

I think both of us did not anticipate falling for each other.. but it happened.

Life was a bliss.. and as they said, good times flies and it came the time when I have to come home after I finished my uni. I left with a heavy heart.

I was hoping that I can maintain the long distance relationship but it is really hard.

When I think back about what has happened, I guess the tell-tale signs are there, but I refused to see that a breakup is coming.

I went down to Singapore to see him when he flew back there for his summer holiday and finally he mustered courage to break up.

I cried my eyes out and felt the world has come to an end. My soul felt hollow and empty.

What has hurt me more is that by virtue that I'm a Malaysian, his mom has branded me as a gold digger. I did not realise that his family is rich. I felt angry... Is it a sin to be a Malaysian? And he did not even defend me, when he knows that I'm not with him for him money. I did not even know what does his father do for a living and I don't care about that.

We parted as friends.

For a few years after that, I closed my heart. I lost my brother at the same time and I needed time for myself. After that, I've met some rotten apples but things happened when you least expected it.

I met my soulmate at the point when I was about to give up on relationships last year.

When I think about what has happened, I felt really blessed with the turn of events, even though it might seem bad at that time. Things happened for a reason and if my ex-bf has not broken up with me, I would not have met my current bf.

What a journey it has been...

There is indeed light at the end of the tunnel.